Swine Flu. 7 dead. 6.5 billion not dead.

May 11, 2009


Back in the old days whenever your country was going through a bad time financially you had to go start a war somewhere to take peoples minds off of it.  Lots of people died, millions more suffered, things were never the same afterwards but generally the financial situation seemed to sort itself out.

But these days we have exotic sounding diseases that do the job so much better.  Hardly anyone dies and the only suffering is having to sit through endless “investigative journalism” reports and “urgent updates” on telly.  It takes everybody’s minds off the recession without having to commit troops or make up cool war slogans… so all in all a good result.


Can’t park there.

May 11, 2009


KKK. Circa 1968.

May 11, 2009


Incidentally, am I the only one to notice that the KKK dress themselves in a manner that really only blacks and gays would ever  be able to pull off?  Seriously, they’re ultra conservative white guys and have no business outside grey polyester two piece suits. You just can’t be a bigot and dabble in experimental fashion at the same time.

Space Invader 101.

May 11, 2009


Nerd Patrol 1. Satin Nana 0.

May 11, 2009


Bless you Egypt

May 11, 2009


Marketing Insight.

May 11, 2009

umreally.jpgI got sent this the other day by someone who thought it was the funniest thing they had ever seen in a two dollar shop.  She was probably right.

But I reckon if the exact same product was put in a container half as small and sold for 20 times the price with a L’Oreal label on the front then all we would hear about in Vogue magazine would be ‘hair mayonnaise’ and everyone would say it with a straight face without thinking twice.  Because that’s how marketing works.

Last time I went to the hairdresser they tried to sell me a bottle of salt-water for $20. Honest to God.

sad but true.

May 11, 2009


Actually, I think this is probably the only good bit of marketing that Metallica have ever done… I bet it was that psychiatrist guy that came up with the idea.  My personal jury is still out on Metallica… I watched “Some Sort of Monster” last year and I have a sneaking suspicion that the documentary was just a more cleverly written version of “Spinal Tap”  and that in five years time Metallica will jump out of a big cake and go “Surprise! we fooled you into thinking we were a bunch of dicks who had really bad taste in art and let a shrink control our band!”.

On the other hand all Metallica lyrics read like they were written by  13 year old boys…  so who knows?

Domestic dog performs custom mod on family hatch.

May 11, 2009


War in Congo. Hints and Tips.

May 11, 2009

war_in_congo_22.jpgTip 51: When on patrol never volunteer to go on point.

Tip 52: When there are 5 of you but only 4 guns make sure you’re not the one left with just a stick.

Tip 53: If there is someone in your group that everyone finds annoying make sure you put him on point.  Give him the stick.